Children of all ages experience fear and it's a normal part of development. In this article, we'll explore some common childhood fears and offer tips on how to help children overcome them.

Why do children have fears?

Children feel fearful or experience fears as part of their emotional and cognitive development. As their brains mature, their understanding of the world grows, and their ability to perceive and process threats evolves, resulting in feelings of fear. 

• Newborn (0 to 1 year): Newborns have reflexive fears of loud noises and sudden movements (startle and moro reflexes).

• Infant (6 to 8 months): Infants experience stranger anxiety as they become more aware of familiar and unfamiliar faces.

• Infant (9 to 18 months): Infants experience separation anxiety as they begin to form strong attachments to caregivers.

• Toddlers: Toddlers fear separation from parents, as they lack a full understanding of object permanence.They are also afraid of the dark or loud noises (thunder, vacuum cleaners, sirens) because they have a heightened sensory sensitivity. As toddlers' imagination expands, they may fear imaginary creatures (monsters) because they cannot separate fantasy from reality.

• Preschoolers: Preschool-age children have big imaginations and cannot reality from imaginations, especially at night. This can result in fears of monsters under the bed, shadows, or bad dreams.

Common fears in infants

• Separation anxiety 

• Strangers 

• Loud or sudden noises 

Common fears in toddlers 

• New environments or routines

• Darkness or nighttime

• Thunder and lightning 

• Separation anxiety 

• Monsters 

Common fears in school-age children

• Death

• Animals or insects 

• Thunder and lightning

• Darkness or nighttime

• Being home alone 

What is the difference between fear and anxiety in children

Fear is an immediate response to a real or perceived threat that triggers a fight-or-flight reaction. It is usually specific and short-term.

Anxiety is a more generalized, persistent feeling of worry or apprehension about future uncertainties or potential threats, even in the absence of an immediate threat. 

Tips to help children overcome their fears

• Validate and reassure: Make sure your child feels heard and understood by acknowledging their fears. Avoid shaming or making them feel guilty for feeling scared.

• Teach coping skills: Help your child learn effective coping strategies, such as deep breathing, meditation, or grounding activities to manage fear when it arises.

• Limit screen time: Reduce exposure to media that might trigger fear, such as scary images in TV shows, movies, or video games.

• Overhearing adult conversations: Be mindful of conversations that you have around children, especially if they contain scary or confusing topics. 

• Gradual exposure: Encourage your child to face their fears in small, manageable steps. This helps build confidence and reduces anxiety over time.

• Model bravery: Show your child how to handle fear calmly by demonstrating confidence and problem-solving in challenging situations. Kids often take cues from how adults react.

When to consult a pediatrician 

Consult your pediatrician if your child:

• Struggles with anxiety that interferes with school, sleep, or daily activities.

• If your child experiences persistent worry or fear lasting weeks or months.

• Suffers from frequent headaches, stomachaches, or fatigue.

• Has panic attacks, extreme clinginess, or uncontrollable crying.

• Shows little improvement despite reassurance, coping strategies, or gradual exposure.